[Apologies. The image for this post may cause offence to young people who care more about climate change than empire.]

It appears the Prime Minister (or one of his SPADs) has been watching his box set of Yes Prime Minister desperately hoping to find inspiration to win a few votes. Nothing like looking back to the 1980s for a good idea.

Bernard Woolley:
He thinks it’s a vote winner

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Ah. That’s more serious. Sit Down. What makes him think that?

Bernard Woolley:
Well, the party have had an opinion poll done. It seems all the voters are in favour of bringing back National Service.

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Well – have another opinion poll done showing the voters are against bringing back National Service.

Bernard Woolley:
We can’t be for it and against it.

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Oh, of course they can, Bernard. Have you ever been surveyed?

Bernard Woolley:
Yes. Well not me actually, my house. Oh, I see what you mean.

….

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Mr. Woolley, are you worried about the rise in crime among teenagers?

Bernard Woolley:
Yes.

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Do you think there is lack of discipline and vigorous training in our Comprehensive Schools?

Bernard Woolley:
Yes.

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Do you think young people welcome some structure and leadership in their lives?

Bernard Woolley:
Yes.

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Do they respond to a challenge?

Bernard Woolley:
Yes.

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Might you be in favour of reintroducing National Service?

Bernard Woolley:
Er, I might be.

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Yes or no?

Bernard Woolley:
Yes.

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Of course, after all you’ve said you can’t say no to that. On the other hand, the surveys can reach opposite conclusions.
Mr. Woolley, are you worried about the danger of war?

Bernard Woolley:
Yes.

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Are you unhappy about the growth of armaments?

Bernard Woolley:
Yes.

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Do you think there’s a danger in giving young people guns and teaching them how to kill?

Bernard Woolley:
Yes.

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Do you think it’s wrong to force people to take arms against their will?

Bernard Woolley:
Yes.

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Would you oppose the reintroduction of conscription?

Bernard Woolley:
Yes.
[does a double-take]

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
There you are, Bernard. The perfectly balanced sample.

Be prepared for plenty of psychological manipulation over the next month. Maybe we should all read ‘Thinking Fast and Slow’ so we can be on our guard?